The Children and the Adults

What differentiates a boy from a Man, and a girl from a Woman? This question has entered everyone's mind at some point or another, the real underlying question probing the person being, "Am I a man yet?", or "Am I a Woman yet?"

There are physical characteristics of the body as it matures which generally are associated with Manhood and Womanhood, yet I have personally found that these physical characteristics come much quicker than the emotional and mental characteristics which, to me, signify the true coming of Manhood and Womanhood.

I am no female, yet the observations I have made give me the following conclusions. Girls want to be noticed. They want to be chased after by boys. They want to have boys fight over them and so they use jealousy as a tool. Girls like the mean boys, the boys who will do anything to get what they want because Girls feel worth something when boys fight over them.They want to be doted upon and have things bought for them and be told how pretty they are. Girls want what they can't have and will do anything to get it. They gossip and glare, flick their hair and spray obnoxious amounts of perfume in the air. Some things that girls do, or are looking for, in and of themselves are in no way bad and are important parts of healthy relationships, but most girls are looking for self-validation in the wrong place and in the wrong way. They are looking for self-validation through boys.

Boys want girls. It is engrained in biology and while the desires aren't bad, the actions based on these motives are immature. Boys want girls to be surrounding them and touching them. Boys want more than one girl; they make girls who reject them feel bad about themselves, and pick fights with other boys over girls. Boys will stop at nothing to get what feels good and makes them feel good about themselves. Boys pretend to be what they arent--they haven't figured out who they are supposed to be yet so they put on different faces to please those around them. Boys do not show emotion because they think emotion is weak.

Women are different. A Woman will never purposefully use jealousy as a tool to gain affection. A Woman understands that she cannot always be doted upon and that her beauty is not only a gift, but a curse than can fuel fires of hate. They have it, preserve it, do not neglect it, and are grateful for it, but do not needlessly flaunt it. A Woman understands that she can't have everything that she wants, but sometimes must be self-sacrificial. Women do not like the jerk boys because they do not need validation from someone so immature; they don't like the boys who chase them for their looks, but the Men who strive to truly know them.

True Women like the true Men. The Men who are leaders and do what is responsible, not what gives them instant gratification. The Men who know who they are and who they want to be, yet still understand that love is willing to change for love. The Women don't love the boys who show no emotion, they love the Men who control their emotions, the Men who in the face of fear show know fear, even if it fills them. The Men who cry not because they want pity, but because the bottling up of emotions leads to rage and jealousy. The Men who admit weakness because admitting weakness is the first step to conquering it. The Men who do what needs to be done even if it is uncomfortable or difficult. A Woman loves the Man who wants them not only because they are attractive but because the true Men know that love takes two grown-up, mature people who are ready and willing to make sacrifices for one another.

To put it bluntly, people are mature when they are ready to truly and selflessly love another. They are mature when they are no longer looking for the petty attractions of boys and girls, but the mutual love of a Man and a Woman. The love that gives and takes equally. The love that says, "Life is hard, but I will put aside my wants for your wants, my needs for your needs, and together we can make it."